Disclaimer -- Yes, they belong to Marvel. Yes, I'm just borrowing them. Yes, I'll give them back as soon as possible. It's been pointed out that Cyclops can see colors more or less normally, but since it's the season to be silly (and I was *dared*), that fact is going to be ignored for a brief time.
I think it's been about eight months since my last post to the list. I guess I'm due. Brownie points for anyone who gets the musical reference in the story.
For Andrea, because she *dared* me.
Oh What-the-baum?!
by Kerri
"What," Jean asked faintly, "is this?"
Scott looked at the item in question. "It's a Christmas tree?" he ventured, now not as sure as he had been two hours ago. He's just spent his morning locating a tree, transporting it here, cramming it into the tiny living room of the boat house, and then decorating it. A job well done, he thought, rather pleased with himself.
"That is *not* a Christmas tree."
Scott blinked at the object in the corner. "It's tree shaped, it has little dangling balls and twinkling lights, and it's December. Looks like a Christmas tree to me."
Take a deep breath, Jean told herself. In. Out. Slowly. Yes, control. Control is good. Control is my friend. "Scott, dear, you know I love you..."
He looked at her. "Why do I think this has nothing to do with rock 'n roll?"
"What?" his wife asked, then shook her head. "Scott, that is not a Christmas tree. It's....aluminum!"
"I thought it would be easier than a real one," he explained. "We won't have to worry about watering it, or needles dropping all over the floor if we don't have time to take it out before the end of January." He grinned at her. "And we can save it for next year, too."
"But Scott.... do you know it's pink?"
"Pink?" He looked at it again. "I thought it was just me." No wonder Wolverine laughed himself silly and wouldn't help him. "That must be why I got it at such a good price."
"And the ornaments..."
"The salesclerk said they'd match."
"They're yellow!"
"So you're saying you don't like it? What about the lights? Those are supposed to match too."
Jean's eyes crossed. "The lights," she said very slowly, "are orange. Orange lights and yellow balls on a pink aluminum tree. A seven foot pink aluminum tree."
"Maybe you'll like it better with the color wheel."
"The what?!"
"The color wheel. The clerk said it was very popular." He took a light wheel from a box nearby and plugged it in, positioning it at the base of the tree. The bright light glimmered through the four-color plastic wheel.
Jean's face paled as the tree began to shine red, blue, green and purple by turns. Popular in the 1960s!
She turned to beg for rescue, but the look on Scott's face stopped her. He looked satisfied with his morning efforts. She decided right then and there it was a good thing he was such a good man and that she loved him so much, because things like this would have driven her to the nearest bell tower long ago. "Well, maybe we'll leave it up until Easter."
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